These last few weeks have been very, very hard.
I'm slowly picking up the pieces, stitching my heart back together and trying to continue on with mundane everyday life things. Like groceries. And laundry. And yardwork.
I have also been pouring myself into make beads from the funeral flowers. My goal is to use those beads to make memorial jewelry pieces for the family... It won't take away the hurt, but it has helped me to have my hands busy with something I know to do. Besides, Patty loved flowers and jewelry both--and I think this is a fitting tribute, and would have made her smile.
...and now I know that white roses turn into tan/brown beads. Huh. Who knew?
I'm also getting read to go on vacation coming up soon, so I will continue to be scarce here. Thank you all for being patient with me as I tackle this loss. I'm doing my best not to push the grief away, but to embrace it and feel it and hopefully have it turn to healing. I'm so grateful that I loved her so much that I am hurting this much... She was definitely a gift, and a dear dear friend.
My love to you all. May your upcoming week treat you kindly.
My mother-in-law passed away Tuesday evening.
She was an incredibly dear friend. I started writing letters to her back when I was in middle school, and have known her for more than 20 years (I think the actual count is 26?). She was a fellow writer with a wonderfully quirky sense of humor, she was incredibly supportive of my jewelry making, and she just so happened to be the mother of the man I fell in love with. I couldn't have been more lucky.
And now, faced with her loss--realizing that there are stories that she will never finish writing, and my own stories that I will never get to share with her--I am grieving.
My husband is grieving.
His family is grieving.
...I may not be back on my blog for a little while. The world is still bright and full of wonder, but my heart is shattered. I am blessed that I knew her so well--and I am blessed that I can be part of this family as we lean on each other and mourn.
I wish you all peace and a beautiful August... hold your loved ones close, and please keep looking for beauty.
I will be back when I am able.
